The difficult decision was made to remove Brittany’s respirator, as it was only prolonging the inevitable. She passed away quietly on the evening of April 4th, surrounded by friends and family. A memorial service is scheduled for Saturday April 18th, details available on the following website: http://prayforbrittany.blogspot.com/.

All of this happened while we were traveling; we saw her in California in February, found out she was in the hospital while we were in Texas in March, prayed fervently while following her physical decline while in Tennessee, and heard of her passing the day after arriving in North Carolina. I have strived to be moral support and prayer support to her family and her closest friends who have stayed by her side each day of this difficult journey. I checked all electronic avenues of information available multiple times a day hoping to find a glimpse of good news from our friends who were with her at the hospital.

Helpless to help, yet not helpless at all.

I don’t know why I was meant to be traveling the other side of the US while a dear friend was dying in a California hospital bed. I do know that the support I was able to give, the fighting I was able to do on her behalf, was such that it could be done from anywhere in the world. Prayer, communicating the need to prayer partners around the world, and encouragement of friends can be done from anywhere. God was in control of the situation, regardless of my physical location. I know that. I know that now and I knew it then, as difficult as it was to understand.

God is a sovereign God. I don’t understand in my own knowledge why he chose to use me in a long-distance support role to her, but he indeed works in mysterious ways. Even thinking back, I realize this. When I first heard the diagnosis of the physical illnesses that would shadow Brittany’s bright life over the following six years, I was even then in another country - on the other side of the world from her and our group of friends, helpless to do anything but pray. I followed her ups and downs over the years, often from a distance, at times in person. Living in Europe for the past three years with a few trips back to the US made it difficult to culture friendships that were anything but long distance. That was something I had intended to make up for during our time back.

I thank God for the opportunities he gave me to show his love to Brittany. Praying for her time in YWAM while on the floor of our living room in Spain, chatting over instant messenger, occassional emails, a few bright sparks of personal interaction, fervent prayer and tears while on the floor of the guest room in Tennessee… although I in my flesh have wished for more time, I know that God used me and our relationship, and sovereignly planned the steps we would take.

¹ O LORD, you have searched me
and you know me. …

¹³ For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

¹⁶ your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

¹⁷ How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!

Psalm 139

Trusting His Purposes

When realizing that God’s plan was not to leave her on this earth, I began to see that I was supposed to return to California for the memorial service, while Tim stayed here to pursue our support-raising endeavors. My role of long distance support will now be one of personal support. Tim and I were both in agreement, and started making plans in faith, knowing that if we have trusted God to provide and direct each step of this trip so far, he would not fail to do the same for what I had been convicted to do now.

Praise the Lord for two big answers and confirmations:

1. Tim is scheduled to speak at a church the day after I fly to California. (But what about me? Don’t I always do most of the talking?) Well, God planned it perfectly so that Tim would receive an enthusiastic offer to speak about our ministry for the duration of a men’s group meeting - which I would not be present for even if I had stayed! Yes, this will be the first time he has had to do something this involved, but I have confidence that he can do it, with God’s help.
2. Through a generous gift, God has provided two-thirds the cost of my plane ticket, within a day of our buying it!

Yes, I am going “home” for a week, and yes we are still here raising support. It just so happens that for one week my husband’s and my ministry will be moving in different directions, ordained by the same God.

Though our God is beyond my understanding, two things I will say: Yes and Amen.

Thank you to the many around the world who are praying for our dear friend Brittany. It means a lot to us to know that she is covered in prayer from Spain, Canada, and across the US, in addition to being surrounded by a group of loved ones at the hospital in California.

Below is a website where you can follow her status and show your support.

http://prayforbrittany.blogspot.com/